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Books, videos and other resources listed on this page are among many I share with my clients. These reflect a variety of perspectives on a wide array of personal growth and relationship issues for reference only. The content on this page or within these resources is not intended to be construed as advice but offered as a curated resource for further exploration.  


The School of Life YouTube Channel - Alain de Botton

- Alain de Botton on Love

- Are You Difficult to Love?

- Can People Change?

- Criticism When You've Had a Bad Childhood

Honest Communication

How to be a Friend to Yourself

How to Choose a Partner Wisely
How to Forgive

How to Help Those We Love

How to Remain Calm with People

Overcoming Childhood 

- Why Tiny Things About our Partners Drive us Mad
- Interview with Alain de Botton "On Being" NPR
Being a Good Listener
Be the Change You Want to See

- Eastern Philosophy – The Buddha
- Emotional Translation
- Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)
- Freud on: Sublimation
- Good Enough is Good Enough
- Higher Consciousness
- Honest Communication
- The Horrors of Children

- How Can We Grow Emotionally?

- How Best to Manage Your Moods

- How a Messed Up Childhood Affects You in Adulthood
- How Not to be Angry All the Time

- How Not to be Defensive in Relationships
- How Not to Rant

- How Our Childhoods Affect Our Adult Life

- How Romantic Attachment Works
- How the Right Words Help Us to Feel the Right Things
- How to Argue With Our Partner
- How to Be a Friend to Yourself

- How to Be a Good Listener
- How to Be a Man
- How to Be Selfish
- How to Become a Better Person
- How to Choose a Partner Wisely
- How to Complain

- How to Cope with an Avoidant Partner
- How to Find Meaningful Work
- How to Forgive

- How to Get Angry a Lot
- How to Get Over Rejection
- How to Get Over Someone
- How to Help Those We Love
- How to Keep Growing Up

- How to Know Yourself

- How to Love 

- How to Overcome Trauma
- How to Process Your Emotions
- How to Remain Calm With People

- How to Remain Emotionally Mature in a Crisis

- How to Test Your Emotional Maturity
- How We Lie to Ourselves

- Hypervigilance and How to Overcome It
- An Instruction Manual to Oneself

- Knowing Ourselves Intellectually vs Knowing Ourselves Emotionally
- The Meaning of Life
- On Being Hated
- On Being Out of Touch With One’s Feelings
- On Feeling Depressed
- Overcoming Childhood
- Panic Attacks
- Pessimism for Lovers
- Philosophical Meditation

- Should We Laugh or Should We Cry?

- Status Anxiety

- Transference

- The Challenges of the Anxious-Avoidant Relationship

The Challenge of Being Close

- The Dangers of Loving or Hating Too Much

- The Eight Rules of the School of Life

- The Hardest Person in the World to Break Up With

- The Importance of Vulnerability

- The One Subject You Really Need to Study: Your Own Childhood

- The Problem of Shame

- The Problem With Perfectionism
- The Purpose of Friendship
- The Sanity of Madnes

- The Course of Love - Alain de Botton
- The Weakness of Strength

- The Wisdom of Animals

- Twenty Signs That You are Emotionally Mature

- What is An Emotionally-Healthy Childhood?
- What is Narcissism?

- What is Your Attachment Style?
- What It’s Like Inside Our Minds

- Who We Can Love

- Why Avoidant and Anxious Partners Find it Hard to Split Up

- Why Are We So Easily Triggered?
- Why Humanity Destroyed Itself
- Why Introspection Matters

- Why Love is Never As Nice As It Should Be

- Why None of Us Can Escape Catastrophe
- Why Our Partners Drive Us Mad
- Why Socrates Hated Democracy
- Why Tiny Things About Our Partners Drive Us Mad

- Why Touch Means So Much in Love
- Why We Are All Addicts- Why We’re All So Anxious

- Why We Are Mean to Those We Love
- Why We Eat Too Much
- Why We Only Learn What We Repeat

- Why We Pick Difficult Partners
- Why We Should Treat Our Partners Like Small Children
- Why We Sulk and How Not To
- Why You Will Marry the Wrong Person
- Why You Shouldn’t Trust Your Feelings
- Wisdom

Articles / Videos

- The 5 Qualities of Emotionally Mature People - Niklas Goke

- Alain de Botton on What Makes a Good Communicator and the Difficult Art of Listening in Intimate Relationships - Maria Popova

- Psychotherapy (Defenses) - Anna Freud

- Psychotherapy (Relationships) – John Bowlby

- Psychotherapy (Ambivalence) – Melanie Klein

- Psychotherapy (Parenting) – Donald Winnicott



5 Things We Cannot Change & the Happiness We Find by Embracing Them – David Richo

7 Principles for Making Marriage Work - John Gottman

Barking Up the Wrong Tree – Eric Barker

Becoming Attached – Robert Karen

Behave – Robert Sapolsky

Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that will Transform your Sex Life – Emily Nagoski

The Developing Mind - Daniel Siegel

Do What You Love, The Money Will Follow - Marsha Sinetar

Drama of the Gifted Child - Alice Miller

Emotional Intelligence - Daniel Goleman

Family Rules – Kenneth Kaye

Feeling Good – David Burns

Growing Up Again – Jean Clarke and Connie Dawson

Happiest Baby on the Block Harvey Karp

Happiest Toddler on the Block – Harvey Karp

How Not to Die – Michael Gregor

How to Be An Adult in Relationships - David Richo

How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk – Faber & Mazlish

Intimate Partners - Maggie Scarf

Mindset – Carol Dweck

Necessary Losses - Judith Viorst

The Obstacle is the Way – Ryan Holliday

Originals, How Non-Conformists Move the World – Adam Grant

Outliers – The Story of Success – Malcolm Gladwell

The Passionate Marriage – David Schnarch

Power of Habit Charles Duhigg

Sapiens – Yuval Harari

Social Intelligence – Daniel Goleman

Stealing Fire – Steven Kotler & Jamie Wheal

Tools of Titans – Tim Ferriss

The Two Step: The Dance Towards Intimacy – Eileen McCann

The Verbally Abusive Relationship – Patricia Evans

Why Does He Do That – Lundy Bancroft

The Wisdom of Insecurity - Alan Watts

Mama's Last Hug Animal Emotions and What They Tell Us About OurselvesFrans de Waal



Hidden Brain - NPR

- Don't Panic: Stories of Coping Amid Chaos

- Guys We Have A Problem: How American Masculinity Creates Lonely Men

- I'm Right, You're Wrong

- In The Heat of the Moment: How Intense Emotions Transform Us

- Liar, Liar

- 'Man Up': How a Fear of Appearing Feminine Restricts Men and Affects Us All

- The Ostrich Effect

- The Science of Compassion

- Think Fast with Daniel Kahneman author of Thinking Fast and Slow

- What Can a Personality Test Tell Us About Who We Are?

What Monkeys Can Teach Us About Being Human

- You 2.0: The Empathy Gym

- You 2.0: When DId Marriage Become So Hard?I

TED Radio Hour - Reframing Anger

- TED Talk - Ryan Martin - Why Do We Need Anger?

- TED Talk - Soraya Chemaly - Who's Allowed To Get Angry?

- TED Talk - Russell Kolts - How Can We Use Compassion to Manage Our Anger?

The Other Side of Anger - NPR

- How Inuit Parents Teach Kids To Control Their Anger

- Got Anger? Try Naming It To Tame It

- Anger Can Be Contagious - Here's How to Stop the Spread

- From Fruit Fly to Stink Eye: Searching For Anger's Animal Roots

- Disciplining Kids Without Yelling: Readers Tell Us Their Tricks

- Can Inuit Moms Help Me Tame My 3-Year-Old's Anger?

Talks by Bob D. - Alcoholics Anonymous (YouTube)

- Having an Unmanageable Life, Steps 2 and 3 (Part 2 of 5)

- Forgiveness, Letting go, Resentment, Fear and Love (Part 4 of 5)

- Inner Peace, Wonderful Amends Stories, Helping Others (Part 5 of 5)

- Dealing with Resentment

- Surrender

- The Matters of Fear and Relationships

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